What does family means to you? How do you show love and concern towards your family?… these questions had been repeatedly playing in my mind… after two weeks of shoot! HD fiesta, I have been thinking and reflecting about how I have been treating my parents and how much they have done for me…
At the event, I saw families coming together learning and enjoying themselves together. The bonding and sharing between them… its such a touching moment to see how they expressed themselves infront of the camera and through the process of filming, discover their feelings from deep down in their heart.
Then I asked myself… how many times have I told my parents that I care for them, how much I love them and how much it hurts to see anyone of them upset… sadly, never. The tradition in the family is such that we keep our feelings in ourselves, and we failed to show them the right way. More than often, we use the wrong way or send an opposite meaning to one another when we want to express that we care… (mmm… the words I’ve typed doesn’t seem to be making sense… I’m not good with all these kind of words… but I think the idea is there lah… ) Putting it in simple words… I love my family, but I just don’t know how to tell them. The common three words – I love you, isn’t that common in my family’s dictionary. But I know they love me. And I hope they know I love them too.
Recently, I find that I am spending more time with them. But still I know its not enough. I feel guilty of not going out often with them, I feel guilty of hiding in my room instead of sitting at the living room with them… but that’s just a habit or culture that we’ve all adapted to. Guess we just need to all take a little time to think and do what should be done. So I did. I’ll try to find topics to talk to them, I’ll try to meet my mum for dinner when I have a chance to, and I try to get some laughter from mum every night when she comes in to give me my daily vitamin pills. These are just little things that I am trying to do to show that I love and care.
Maybe one day… just one fine day… we will get to a point where saying I love you, is just a daily thing that we do.
** P/s: ok… after typing out all that… and reading it again, it really doesn’t quite flow leh! hahaa!! Think cos my brain and fingers are frozen by the super strong air-con in the lab… and maybe its cos of the groaning coming from my stomach… but aiyah.. whatever lah… you understand what I typed that that’s good lah, if you don’t than its ok also lah… lol!!