Cannot even recall when I did a post that’s emo. I sometimes wonder if I’ll ever get emo again ever since the craziness started at work. Its good to be crazy, cause that means the company’s getting noticed. But its bad when the craziness starts eating into all our personal space. I know my partner, molemole is very exhausted. Especially when you see her getting from the pretty girl to the tired looking woman now. I feel it woman! We’ll take a break after the craziness ok? I promise! BKK?
Why the sudden need to want to be emo you asked? Because I broke down, totally lost myself just now. After the office cleared, after I replied all the backdated emails, after I rushed down to his block, I broke down at the sight of him. Seems so long since I last saw him. I am guilty for not spending time with him. I am guilty of not being able to help him prepare for Hari Raya like how I did for the past 5 years. I am guilty for not doing my part as his other half. I am a guilty girl.
I am relieved now that he said he understands. I am relieved now that he said he still cares. I am relieved now that I know he still knows I’m around for him. I am relieved now knowing that I will be able to focus my mind on the craziness for the next 11 days and still be able to have him by my side (mentally).
Thank you for understanding. Thank you for your love. Thank you for the space you’re giving me. Thank you very much.
So for the next 11 days, I will be on a long roller coaster ride. I don’t know how many falls I will have to meet, I don’t know how many screams I will face. I will be strong. And I will fight till the end.